What happens when my brain splits in two.

dear hearts

Unkept may be the two sides of my brain, but Dear Hearts is the two sides of my heart.

It was difficult to write, not only canvassing the pain that comes when infidelity inflicts a marriage and family, but writing from the perspective of a man who loves said family and adores said marriage yet has an affair with another man? Well, all I can say is life is gritty and Mitch’s life? It ain’t no exception.

Each word sheared away a piece of my heart.

Mitch and Elena are characters that are deeper than characters. They’re a pulse, working together and withering apart. They are victims to their own love story, craving happy endings when understanding what true, devotional, Godly love is has never glimmered on their radar.

They’re the prime example of what happens when life shuffles its cards and you’re left empty-handed.

What can we learn? Appreciate everything you have, even when  life feels like a single grain of sugar boring through a tooth.  Talk openly, honestly. Do no judge but do not blindly accept either.

Love with a sacrificial heart and an expanse of pure dedication.

Know that we only flicker here for a little while. So use every moment.


Dear Hearts is for the over eighteen crowd so please keep that in mind. Also understand that this book is not a promotional platform for any particular viewpoint. It is an examination into the human mind and heart and the struggle life brings when you leave God out of the picture.

You can read Dear Hearts for free here on Wattpad.

Click here for the ebook.

Click here for a paper copy.

Dear Ava,

I’m a horrible mother. And a terrifically good mother. And a no nonsense mother and a spastic, nonsensical type of female who keeps parking crookedly and forgets the word for fork sometimes, and then other times I feed people my brilliance.

I don’t think any of us were meant to be good at this.

But I think that’s okay. I think for the first time ever, there’s no good mother Olympics, no gold to be won.

There are mistakes and bruises and tears and the way she looks at me like she’s known me before she was born and wishes she’d never met my face.

It’s the same way I look into the mirror sometimes.

But there are those other crystal clear moments, a love abundant, a love like Christ’s, where I can feel it all weaving together, broken skin healing and that sound she makes when she breathes.

Step one, we are alive.

Step two, start living,

Step three, write down, paper to pen.

Dear Ava,

I’m sorry.

But dear Ava,

You now know the truth.

Buy books, give love.

on Instagram: http://ift.tt/1TLwGIi

Just made a donation to @thescarlethope because my amazing readers keep buying my books! 💟

Every cent of every book I sell goes directly to charitable organizations, and this go round, we’re donating to a Louisville based organization that provides support and love to women trying to remove themselves from the adult entertainment industry. If you’d like to help, just see the link in my Instagram profile or hit the “donate” button in the menu bar of my website.
Let’s help save the world one word at a time!! 🌎 ❤

#louisville #charity #donate #donations #books #readersofig #readersofinstagram #writersofig #writerofinstagram #writerslife #wp #twitter #picoftheday #writer #authorsofinstagram #author #book #reading #read #help #linkinprofile

The chronicle of a changing heart.

on Instagram: http://ift.tt/1QjYtPH

Testimony. That’s a word I never really understood, and I also never understood why it’s so important to hear another person’s story, their commitment to Jesus.

Really, I wasn’t much of a religion fan so I wasn’t too keen on listening anyways.

But I allowed myself to be dragged to church a few months ago and found an entire building filled with others who aren’t fans of religion either.

They’re fans of changing the world.

So my heart started softening and I started doing a little more praying, and I actually started to see my life as a conduit for love and goodness that could potentially save another person’s life.

I let go and let God, as they say.
And then something strange happened. The anxiety I’ve had since I was five just up and disappeared. I no longer had my depressive episodes, the night terrors where I spun out of my body and literally felt a terrifying presence with me in the room, telling me all sorts of vicious things. I no longer woke up wanting to kill myself and feeling like a failure as a wife and mother because all I wanted to do was disappear.

I know love now. And no, I’m not perfect, but my soul feels that way. I wake up now with a peaceful joy like a veil’s been lifted off my eyes, and I can actually see through the darkness that used to suffocate me.

Maybe this makes sense. Maybe it doesn’t. All I know is that it’s my truth, and I finally understand the importance of sharing it.
I no longer lament the darkness that tortured me, especially if it can be used to heal another person’s heart.

#testimony #christianity #love #hope #god #jesus #truth #twitter #wp

Even the hardest of hearts.

on Instagram: http://ift.tt/1YKtqzG

Even when our hearts are breaking, God calls us to keep our faith. We’ve been reading the bible with Ava at night (something I’ve never done before), and I’m absolutely mystified by the hardships God’s people have had to face. But their commitment to love, to the Lord’s goodness, completely changes the pattern of the story, a story we’re still living today. Hope and love and a commitment to something higher than ourselves can transform even the hardest of hearts. “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” John 16:33

#love #peace #prayersforsanbernardino #prayerworks #prayer #faith #bibleverse #christian #heart #twitter #wp

A prayer for love and understanding.

on Instagram: http://ift.tt/1Pwv4mZ

I keep thinking of this gentleman’s story on @humansofny. His brother committed suicide after living a life of constant anger, and he became the glue that kept his parents together after his brother’s death. He’s now in a situation where he wants to talk to his mother about his homosexuality, but after his mother made a remark about a homosexual couple, he doesn’t feel he can.

If you have a moment, can you say a prayer for him? It’s so hard feeling so alone in this life and not having the opportunity to seek comfort in the people you love most. I pray he can feel God’s love and that his mother puts aside her own personal feelings to be the strength he needs right now. “Even if my father and mother should desert me, you will take care of me.”
Psalms 27:10

#prayer #prayerworks #prayerworkswonders #love #bibleverse #wp #twitter

For our struggle is not against flesh and blood.

12338499_410094819115042_2087287040_n

I don’t watch the news. The news, for me, is constant fear, a degradation of all that’s good in this world and a lumping of human beings into conflicting categories.

And we all know nothing good comes from fear.

Here’s an exercise: the next time you’re blinded by a news segment, a status update, a few phrases on the radio that start to quicken your heart and turn you against an entire group of people, release yourself from it. Turn off the TV, the computer, the radio and choose someone to pray for.

WE are flesh and blood.
WE are not the problem.
Evil is the problem.
And it’s up to us to decide if we’ll allow it to worm its way into our hearts. ❤

#truth #picoftheday
#bibleverse
#christianity #evil #fear #love #writerslife #writersofig #writersofinstagram #wp #twitter

If it feels right, you know it’s meant to be.

There’s an organization called Scarlet Hope that is everything the world should be.

It’s aim is to help women remove themselves from the adult entertainment industry by offering transitional-living, career counseling, housing, mentoring, transportation, and drug rehabilitation. They give women the option of living a more hopeful life for themselves and their children.

This organization has gotten me think about ways that I can help. Volunteering my time is a little difficult right now, so I figured I could offer my talent and treasure instead. This is why I’m relaunching Tipsy Lit, and I’m currently looking for poetry submissions.

tipsy lit books

My aim is to regularly publish poetry chapbooks that reflect the human soul and raise money for charitable organizations like Scarlet Hope. Published poets will receive a free PDF, ePub, or mobi copy for the amazing gift they’ve given the world.

Below is a chapbook of my own poetry that I’ve published under the Tipsy Lit imprint. The book is a $1 (it only comes in a PDF version), and all proceeds will be going to Scarlet Hope.

Thank you to everyone who purchases a copy.

too human

 

Too Human: A Poetry Chapbook

Buy Now Button with Credit Cards

*If you’d like your ebook sent to an email address other than your PayPal email, please make a note of this in the “Note to Seller” box. Please also note if you would like the PDF, ePub, or mobi version.

Be the change.

Be the Change | erickaclay.com

This has always been a tough one for me.

I’ve always been one to talk a big game about being selfless and loving others, but I was also always the first one to wave my middle finger out on the road.

Sorry, traffic.

It really wasn’t until I allowed Christ to be part of the equation that I could really even consider putting others in front of my needs, my wants, my ambition.

It was easy to guard my heart in the name of self-preservation. It only made sense to constantly defend myself because humility and kindness meant weakness to me. It meant setting yourself up just to get torn down.

But then I became tired of being so bitter. I wanted something more for myself. And I wanted something more for the people who came in contact with me.

I realize I’ve been given the chance to give love in such a way that it reworks the course of humanity and heals a slew of broken hearts. We all have. And that, for me, is more than enough reason to celebrate today and the opportunity it brings.

from Instagram: http://instagram.com/p/93mrAott1e/?taken-by=erickaclay