I was listening to a podcast by Denaye Barahona called Simple Families. I like listening to Denaye. She has a pretty calming presence and talks slowly. I, too, would one day like to master the art of the slow talk. Maybe whenever coffee’s outlawed.
Anyways, Denaye had on Lena Derhally, a psychotherapist and expert in narcissism and the author of The Facebook Narcissist. Their conversation was fascinating, and I kept nodding my head along whilst navigating traffic. How quickly we humans turn something that could be pretty beneficial into a shrine for ourselves.
I’ve been going through some real introspection lately. I have a sinner’s heart (just like the rest of us), and I’ve been known to hit “publish” without thinking before, especially when it comes to my personal profile. As Lena points out, who doesn’t want affirmation from our peers? But when we live for that type of validation, confirmation that says a perfect looking life is the ONLY life how horrible do we feel when we know our lives aren’t that perfect? That the photos only serve to cover the reality of the situation?
Something else Lena mentioned was how many people in her feed are over the top with their affections for their significant others, posting photos and gushing accolades for their spouses only to seek her out behind the scenes for couples counseling because in reality, they’ve found themselves in really bad places in their marriages.
How easy to build the life you want but can’t figure out how to achieve.
This reminds me so much of the person I used to be and the person who likes to whisper in my ear if I’m not careful. I’m a recovering perfectionist and would love to paint my life in all the colors and hit that “publish” button. But I’ve made a little pact with myself. I’ve quit social media again will use my blog to show you the truth of who I am and how Christ time and again heals my heart and mind.
I think this podcast is a refreshing reminder that everything isn’t as it seems and that maybe a little introspection isn’t a bad thing. I know what it feels like when life backs you into a corner and you want to fight back, showing off all the good you’ve managed to achieve. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with reaching goals God provides for you and of course doing it in a fair and honest way. But tearing down those walls and flipping those tables in a sanctuary that should only be fit for the God of the universe brings a person so much peace.
We were never meant to worship ourselves.