Sometimes, I don’t want to talk about Jesus.
I said it.
Not just speaking, not just believing but FOLLOWING Jesus means giving every part of myself.
And because my venue has always been writing and blogging (the latter since 2009, what what), I know this is the platform God’s designed for me.
He wants me to share how He’s working in my life with others online, even if I know there’s probably been more than one virtual eye roll my direction because of it.
Sometimes, I just want to be normal.
Not that there’s a real, absolute definition of normal. But you get what I mean.
Sometimes, I wish I could just show up with perfectly colored hair, a new Louis Vuitton on my shoulder, and conversation that doesn’t go too far beyond the color of my brand new Mercedes.
And don’t get me wrong. I’m not knocking anyone for their life choices.
I’m knocking me for wanting the very same ones when I already know God didn’t wire me that way.
So what’s a girl to do?
Lay it down.
I have to lay it all down at Jesus’s feet. Because every day I’m realizing more and more that what I had in store for me, isn’t what God has ordained.
He wants me broken and powerless.
“Do I have any power to help myself, now that success has been driven from me?” Job 6:13
No. I can’t help myself. Only God can.
And friendless or no, there’s too much beauty in that to ignore.