BURY THOSE FORKS

Job’s friends are the worst.

They’re slowly sticking a fork into his side in an attempt to “comfort” him.

Here’s a man who’s lost everything. His children, his home, his health. Even his wife tells him to curse God and die.

I relate to Job. But I’d be a liar if I said I didn’t relate to his friends.

Remember my sin, vanity? (https://www.facebook.com/groups/erickawrites/permalink/501393474138910/)

Well, meet my other sin, envy.

I am not good at not being jealous.

I will say I am A LOT better at it than I used to be. But there are still those dark spots in my heart that try to eat it from the inside out.

God has shown me with my skin issues that I’m not less than when I don’t look like perfection. And he’s showing me now that where I am at this moment in my life doesn’t define who I am either.

It’s not about other people and what they’ve accomplished. Because, like the book of Job points out, sometimes God leaves people to their own devices and lets them succeed at their own hands.

And that thought, my friends, is terrifying.

Think about it: God has left them utterly alone to amass wealth and titles and all sorts of goodies and there they go patting themselves on their backs none the wiser.

They’ve never given God the opportunity to circle their sin and bring their attention to it. They’ve never attempted to redefine who they are in Christ and forget the ways of this world.

What do you think will happen to them when they die?

A brand new Mercedes is nice, man, but it ain’t gonna save your soul.

However, not everyone who is blessed with wealth is walking this path. Think of Joseph of Aramathea. He gave his own tomb to Jesus.

Now there’s a man who truly got it.

So the point is this: the health of your heart (not your bank account) totally correlates to your journey to heaven.

If there’s darkness there, sin that’s eating it away, then there’s no room to grow in Jesus.

This is something I have to be mindful of from the moment I wake up to the moment I go to sleep. I am not my circumstances or my accomplishments or the lack thereof.

I am the heart I offer to Christ.

And if it’s dark, if it’s intent on my own success at the expense of everything else, then it’s not the gift I want to offer.

“Though He slay me, yet will I hope in him…” (Job 13:15)

#newblog #bibleverse

ALMOST PERFECT

I did it.

I went without make up yesterday and lived to talk about it.

IT. WAS. FREEING.

All my life I’ve been little miss perfect. There’s even a Shel Silverstein poem called “Almost Perfect” about Mary Hume who goes around muttering “almost perfect but not quite” about everything that doesn’t meet her standards.

I lived that poem.

Of course, one day Mary dies, and God ends up saying the same thing about her.

But apparently, I liked to ignore that part.

I always had straight A’s, great hair and skin, a trim figure, the best parents, anything I wanted even if I didn’t ask for it.

I was also incredibly depressed and suicidal by the age of 16.

Go figure.

I think perfection was a drug for me. I wanted to cling to it to prove I was better than everyone else because having to come to terms with the fact that maybe, just maybe people will like me flaws and all was too risky.

What if they don’t?

Becoming a Christian was the best thing that ever happend to me in that regard.

Because I truly DON’T CARE if other people like me. I care about what God thinks.

Period.

But the last piece to that little puzzle was to walk through the world bare faced, not concened with what anyone thinks about my looks.

Because here’s the thing: pretty doesn’t last forever anyways.

And did everyone run away in terror? No. I even got a couple of compliments about my hair. 😆

One little girl in my Sunday school class did ask why I had dots all over my face and I told her this is what happens when you don’t eat your broccoli. Okay, kidding. I did tell her this is what being an adult means and never grow up. 😆😆

All in all, it was a really good day. I wasn’t checking my face to see how poorly my concealer blended. I wasn’t worried if my mascara smudged.

I was just me, truly in the moment, vowing to God that I’ll remain faithful to him.

Flaws and all.

#acnechronicles #truth

KILLING VANITY

Growth is happening.

And it’s terrifying.

For the past two years I’ve struggled with acne. I’ve always had clear skin and never had to worry about something like that.

But the past two years? It’s been MY LIFE.

Every day, a frustrating battle of slathering on make up and feeling less than because the image in the mirror just doesn’t measure up.

I like to call it my “Job period,” but unlike Job, I wasn’t handling it with extreme grace and an unwavering trust in God.

I was trusting ME to fix the problem and when that wasn’t working, you know Satan would prance on in to point out how horribly I had failed.

What’s really interesting is that last week, I submitted. I told God I was sorry for being so vain and caring about something so silly. You see, it was only an emotional burden because I was MAKING it an emotional burden. If I would have focused on what God says about me, not what I CHOOSE to think about myself, then I would have been released from the psychological struggle.

But I rebelled.

God, being the good God He is heard me. And as soon as my heart was lighter, guess what?

My skin started to clear up.

I’ve been feeling nudged into eating a plant based diet and to change things up in my skin care routine. I can tell you with certainty, this wasn’t my own doing.

Because I had given up.

But once I started trade the trust I had in myself for a much stronger trust in God, life started to shape up and smooth out.

Every single time that happens.

EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.

You’d think I’d learn by now. But I’m human.

Thankfully, I have a God who is much greater.

#beautyisfleeting

“Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;

but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.” Proverbs 31:30